Every night I just feel extremely alone. As I sit in front of my computer and gather my thoughts before bed, all I can think about is how lonely I feel, and how dissatisfied I feel with life thus far.
Is there such thing as night-time depression? Because I feel my most icky and hopeless at night. Maybe that's why I've put off getting help for so long. During the day I usually feel o.k. Sure I have my ups and downs, but it's nothing major, and I just sort of shrug my problems off, and pretend they don't exist. But at night it gets darker outside, and I'm tired from work or school, and I sit in front of my computer for hours and vegetate. I feel incapable of doing anything. It's really horrible. All the happiness I may have felt during the day is drained from my body, and I'm left with this weird outer shell that is myself, with nothing left inside of me.
Wow that sounds dark.
I think I've always sort of felt this way, but it's sort of getting worse these days. It's probably due to two main reasons. For one, the days are getting shorter. The other is that, between work and school, I literally have no days off, so I'm really starting to burn out. Hopefully things will all change for the better in a few weeks. I'll make sure to keep the world posted.
In happier news, cupcakes tomorrow (and a day off!)! I'm excited~! Must remember to charge my camera tomorrow morning :)
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