13.02.04.

1. Ever since moving, I've been eating a lot. Which is good, because everyone seems quite concerned over the fact that I've apparently lost weight... (I haven't owned a scale since moving out of my parents' house, so what would I know...?) Still, I haven't been feeling super well, mainly because I eat like crap. But at least I'm actually eating stuff (crap or no crap), which is a start.

2. People have always been on my case over me being a picky eater. And I never gave it too much thought until recently. But I'm pretty sure I have this. If I didn't used to have it, I for sure seem to have developed it since moving to Japan. I have irrational fears of certain foods, and maybe because of my recent two months of mega stress, it's gotten much worse. Anyway, I think a simple allergy test would fix the problem (long story), I just need to find time to schedule a trip to the doctor's.

3. That and I want to go back on the Pill. Maybe it'll make the earthquakes stop. Which sounds like an extremely weird thing to say, but I'm not gonna lie, March 11, 2011 happened around my first period after coming off the pill.... And my periods always seem to predict earthquakes.... soooo.... maybe this will make them all go away? Heey, it's worth a shot, eh? :P

4. My hands are so fucking dry. And I've started stress-scratchin them too, which really doesn't help the situation... 

5. Man, this blog entry is turning out to be one of those look-at-all-the-things-that-are-wrong-with-me entries. But I'm actually in a pretty good mood right now! Just procrastinating from evil studying. Baah.

6. Survived my three-hour clothes-making written exam. I know I fucked part of it up, but I at least answered all the questions, so that's a good thing, right?

7. If I have another Korean classmate who speaks Japanese better than me tell me that they don't know how to read Kanji, I think I'm just gonna fucking blow up. These people are all very nice, and I do like them. And I don't mean to make this sound racist or anything. But come on, people. If white-y over here can learn to read Kanji AND learn a whole new set of vocabulary AND learn a whole new grammatical pattern, YOU can learn some Kanji, no? It just bothers me, because it's sooo much easier for them to learn Japanese and yet, they don't want to put in the effort to learn how to read properly. It drives me insane. I just can't comprehend it. If these were beginner students, I wouldn't say anything. Because we all have to start somewhere. But out of the three Koreans in my class, two who speak Japanese way better than me, all three of them have told me they can't read Kanji. I'm not saying you have to be able to read all of them. I know I can't. But at least learn how to read the ones we use in class. To tell me that the Kanji on the test were too hard for you to read just blows my mind. We've been using these characters all year, no?

8. Which reminds me, I failed JLPT N1 again. Wasn't all that torn up, actually. Went into the exam having only studied half-assed (was swamped in school assignments and low on motivation, what can I say?), and so I wasn't really expecting to pass. But I technically passed all three sections, just with a total mark too low to pass the exam. So maybe I'll try again in July. December is way too stressful a time of year to take these exams, that's what I learned this time. Just gotta think positively. And study lol.

9. Talking about studying, really not looking forward to my Fashion Business and History of Western Clothing exams tomorrow. I really don't know how to study anymore. I don't read my notes, I just look at the words and the drawings and the pictures in the text book. I might actually be fucked. Hmm.

10. On that note, lets give a final look to my notebooks, dry my hair, and go the fuck to bed. Good night, world!