If I had to describe things these days, I think they only word that could really sum up my emotions is "ugh."
It's not that there's anything wrong right now. It's just... deciding one's future is complicated and stressful. And school hasn't been especially easy these days either.
I've been contemplating all kinds of plans for September, and although all of them seem OK, I can't seem to find the one that fits the best.
I've been seriously contemplating grad school lately and so far I feel like it fits the best... but it's not a perfect fit. And I'm way too late to apply for September/October.... which means potentially waiting around till April if I want to study in Japan, or until the following September if I want to study in Canada.
It's not that I'm in any real rush... but as much as I don't want to face the real world, the idea of waiting around for life to start isn't especially appealing either.
I've been meeting with a grad student at the university near my place, and she's been encouraging me to apply as a research student to fill the gap between September and April... but in order to apply I need to get my shit together ASAP. If I knew 100% that grad school was my calling then I wouldn't be so hesitant... but part of me is just tired of school and wants to find a job and make money....
What do.
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