13.04.06

１.　イベントに参加できて嬉しいんだけど、こういうテーマが私には辛い。だから、ショーはどんなに可愛くても泣きたくなって、苦しかった。

２.　私の「秘密」を皆に言いたいんだけど、言いづらくて、気まずくて、いいタイミングがないから、なかなか言わない。でも別に隠したいことじゃない。

３.　なんで一緒にいるとこんなに楽しいか分からない。むしろ困る。だってさ、あなたにふられたよ。でアタシの友達と付き合い始めたじゃん。あれだけで辛いからさ、don't give me hope.

4. As much as my friends mean well and as much as it's probably true, being told 'He'll never date a gaijin, so don't take it personally!' really isn't something I know how to deal with emotionally yet.

5. At least that part of my day went better than expected. Just give me a bit more time and I should be good with it all. I'm extremely good at becoming friends with guys who've rejected me, it just doesn't happen overnight. Usually.

6. I still want to sit down with you and tell you why I think you're an asshole and why I've been hurt by you over the last few months. Is this what we call closure? Who knows.

7. I've been up for like 19+ hours and my brain is starting to dribble out of my ears. Maybe bed soon.

8. By 7 a.m. today....
     i. I had already been up for two hours
     ii. A stranger tried to get me into his car (he offered me a lift.... but I mean, potato, potahto, right?)
     iii. It was raining
     iv. There was an accident on the yamanote line (i.e. probably a suicide) and the line was down
     v. Because of iv was forced to walk from Yoyogi to Harajuku (20 min walk)
     vi. Because of iv friend was going to be late to the event i was heading to, thus leaving me alone to work with my other friend who just started dating the guy i liked.... (ended up not being awkward at all, but there was initial dreading fear so it counts)

9. I continue to believe that poor is the other eco.